Real Talk: Negative Thoughts
Hi friends, I’ve been struggling all week with an overwhelming amount of negative thoughts that to be honest just trap me in a negativity loop. Does this ever happen to you? Well, it happens to me more often than I’d like.
Most of the time I feel like I can fend off negativity with some sort of imaginary shield, but other times it feels like they become too heavy or there’s too many of them and the weight gets overwhelming. That’s where I’m at now, feeling a bit stuck under this rock of negativity, constantly looping through it all.
It’s hard for me to know what direction to take from this place, because to be honest it just feels to exhausting to think, but think I must and you must and we must.
There’s always hope, even when you don’t feel it or see it.
I’ve been doing my own mini research on habits, how we form them, how we break them etc… and I think that’s the hope I needed to break this current loop of negativity.
Cues and triggers may not change but YOUR routine can. Your routine is the thing you can control.
First: you’ve got to realize what your routine is
Second: figure out what cue or trigger makes that routine happen
Third: isolate the “reward” you feel once your routine is complete
I should note that this “reward” could be either positive or negative; you could be in the routine of doing something that makes you not feel so great. Reward here is just being used as to what you are getting out of this routine that makes you keep coming back. Once you realize this cyclical action you keep going through you can start to make changes, but the changes must happen to your routine. Cues and triggers well, that’s a bigger story and much hard to just let go of or change.
You can however train your brain to do a new routine with your old cues.
For instance, and fair warning this is pretty personal. I have a routine of having low self worth, I can be triggered by this from lots of things like small rejections to large disappointments, my routine that follows is to constantly diminish my own worth, I’ll seek out anything to prove to myself and others my unworthiness. Sounds unhealthy right? Well it’s totally unhealthy and NOT a loop I’d like to keep around.
This is where affirmations and mantras have really been helping me, I combat the need to diminish my own worth with strong, bold statements of truth about myself. These affirmations and mantras act like a stop sign in my brain and help me deflect the downward spiral.
It can be hard because sometimes it’s almost like I “like” sitting in the dark place feeling bad about myself and the world around me, but when I stop and really listen to my inner self, it says “OF COURSE THAT’S NOT A PLACE I’D LIKE TO LIVE”. Forms of self care really bring me back into my own body, to acknowledging how and what I love so much about myself and ultimately that a l w a y s helps get me out of this negativity cycle.
No more pity parties here.
Here’s some recent affirmations I’ve being using:
“Lack of reciprocation is never an indication of your worth”
“I let all the love in”
“I speak positively, I think positively”
Other forms of self care that zap me back into my body and present life are;
- being in nature, (in the sunshine)
- digital detox